Gutfeld! : FOXNEWSW : May 24, 2024 7:00pm-8:00pm PDT : Free Borrow & Streaming : Internet Archive (2024)

hunter bass reeves. >> you contend you had nothing to do with his killing that your gun did. >> yes sir. cartridge in the magazine couldn't throw it out to the barrow so i reached out for the knife and it struck the trigger and the gun went off. >> it's an honor to sit in this chair that's all the time we have. i hope we take proper time to honor the men and women who gave the ultimate sacrifice for this country. may god bless them and gutfeld is next. >> ♪ ♪

[ cheers and applause ] >> greg: yes! all right. i couldn't have said it better. it's friday so you know what that means. look how white i am. let's welcome tonight's guests. he still hasn't adam 12 lunchbox fox news contributor paul mauro. he's both a comedian and a judge see you can laugh at his sensitives. actor and comedian vince august. she is like a serial killer because she ritualistically kills people for gratification. new york times best-selling author and contributor kat timpf

and for the tsa patting him down is an all day job. comedian, best-selling author and fox contributor and nwa world heavyweight champion tyrus. before we get to new stories let's do this. >> a grade so that leftovers. >> greg: it's leftovers where he read the jokes we didn't use and it's my first time reading them so if they suck we tied joe to the bottom of an iranian helicopter. >> greg: what, 2 soon? you guys fans of iranian helicopters. yesterday record turnout for trump's a rally in the bronx residence in such a good move the only stripped half of

donald's limo for parts. in a reference to the rally the governor of new york called trump supporters clowns before asking who does their makeup. as trump was in the bronx what was joe doing having a rally what they call it when first responders try to revive his nonbeating hard. thank you for cheering our first responders. cnn primetime ratings have hit a 33 year low. [ cheers and applause ] but to boost numbers they hired a new anchor to fill the 8:00 pm

slot. >> wow. 1 pundit suggests the chiefs should replace but kerr with a female kicker or ban him from professional sports forever by having them play women's soccer. today's national brothers day to go out and love your brother just don't marry them. today is aviation maintenance technician day or as soon as they call it at boeing what the hell is that day. bob dylan turns 83 today happy birthday. when reached for comment we

couldn't really say anything. new research published reports human testicl*s full of micro plastics the good news your balls are dishwasher safe. according to a study up to half of all ucla medical students filled basic tests of medical competence the good news is every surgery from now on comes with a free hidden sponge. in rome a team of researchers found the long-lost location of plato's tomb inside they found a picture of his old girlfriend. find something in the news

that's all look for a picture at of nancy pelosi joke written. find something in the news about a fat animal find a picture of chris christie, joker written. more and more businesses except payment with facial recognition unless your face breaks the scanner. and finally tomato praises might rise because of extreme heat in mexico now what do they throw it killed need? what you hate tomatoes now to the news the bronx came alive showing ally for 45 he had a

massive rally in new york city drawing thousands of supporters to the bronx nearly all surviving the subway trip there. it's a multiethnic borough home to the yankees a world-famous zoo and the guy who invented the chalk body outline. trump hopes to turn the heavily democratic area republican a red for the first time in decades counting on his growing support among black and latino voters to do so. meanwhile biden is also courting blacks and latinos hiring 2 around the clock night nurses as was trump doing great was he sort of like a hot guy? >> i'm something like a hot guy. i was hot. i think i'm higher than i am now when i became president i don't know.

[ laughter ] another area trump leads by body temperature. and i bet a lot of people think it ask him a question of how you do that how do you get up in the morning and put your pants on. >> can ask you a question, how do you do it and i say do what. how do you put your pants on and i will explain it to you, how do you do it how do you get up how do you do it. it's classic trump sticking his skills where he crushes biden. putting on pants and getting up unassisted. [ cheers and applause ] and trump also discussed serious issues like food prices. i wonder does he eat bacon

anymore? >> i don't eat bacon anymore it's so expensive it's went up from fraud times what's with bacon. on day 1 we will throughout biden economics and replace it with maga economics like your hats say. >> greg: he brings up bacon he's even trying to speak to the view. and these are wise words from president you can eat his breakfast without a straw which leads us to maga. >> make america great again. >> good teeth i've gotta get my teeth like that.

[ cheers and applause ] >> greg: so there is support for 45 and the bronx only democrats go there to set it on fire but there were working men and women many of whom black and hispanic tired of being perpetual victims also why they don't root for the mets as it isn't the maga white supremacist country they would have you believe and their 1 million times better than the spoiled college slots littering campuses with their brand-new tents and old marxist opinions as for the governor of new york these voters are clowns. >> trumps being the ringleader of all these clowns in a place like the bronx. new york will never ever support donald trump for president.

>> greg: trump goes after those in charge and the democrats go after the voters. she calls people clowns with that face of hers? she looks like she just sucked to face with ronald mcdonald. and paul what do you make of this. you heard the police force you get the numbers before we do so tell us about the size of the event and was a smart move? >> the estimate is about 8-10,000 they are pretty accurate but somebody needs to say to her, governor the bronx is in new york. because she insulted them a couple of times over the last month so remember something. the governor loss by about 3% so the moral of this story is all it could take as the bronx because they will remember this

and usually win a guy like trump comes to the bronx they say he's talking to landlords here know he's going to raise the rent we've all been there that's a thing that donald trump despite being a billionaire they hear authenticity this is a guy if he went home with anybody in the crowd. first of all if he went home with the crowd nobody would have a case on them but if he has coffee in the kitchen with anybody in the crowd they will get the same guy who is in there and that's how authenticity works. >> greg: you know what it is as well they are applauding the opinion am about to make if you listen to them he speaks to real things and not ideas he talks about jobs crime the border where joe flounders in ideas like white supremacy threat to democracy the soul of america

these are things you can't top speed talk about jobs or food there's no way i mean i can't say that but this is why he's ahead what you make of this. >> the people he tell you about the solo democracy or freedom and all that also tell you don't talk to my voters because we owned them and that's democrats ably they own voters because they will tell you that vote is hours here's a guy was like i'm going to talk to all the voters go into a district bluer than cookie monsters balls and talk to the people because why not because if i win i will be a president for everyone but democrats don't see it that way. if they win jersey by 2 points they considered a mandate. screw you guys i will talk to 51% and the other 49% deal with it this guys going i'm going to reach out what do i have to lose >> greg: do you think the

cookie monster isn't getting any is that what you are saying? >> nonsense, solie came along and he is bigger and bluer and more relevant. >> greg: do you think he is getting discriminated against because he lives in a garbage can? >> greg: that was the green 1. what is big bird have. >> big bird is a her so i don't know. >> what it you make of the rally? >> she was surprised people showed up how did they find out of it. just everything she said trump is wasting his time in new york

and is not exactly fits his decision to spend so much time here lately. and also is biden going to win new york probably i would be shocked if he doesn't of but that doesn't mean it was a waste of time. this is national news right. everybody is talking about it talking about the people who wanted to see this because who would've expected expected something like this to happen now this if it was wasted just because biden is going to win new york and just calling voters clowns when all you know about them as they wanted to see trump speak really you couldn't have thought she could outdo herself after that comment she sounded just a stupid. >> the gift of trump's he exploits the media they had to cover in people whom are watching that going well he made

of 10,000 people at the rally how many more watching thanks to cnn and msnbc? >> to be clear brothers day was not in february? so was like brother brothers it was biological. >> i was like oh i've got an extra day now you're snatching my dreams away thank you gutfeld the point we are missing here is a made a point they don't care about people he don't vote for them they don't learn from their own mistakes because a certain young lady called them deplorable's and whole reaction of the country change not just by the ones you're talking about people are like well you talk about my neighbors like that people i know like that and they don't care because they think they have in the bag you don't have to do anything because

trump is changing at a given credit because in 2016 he wouldn't have been like this he would've been fighting with everybody he told guys like that where you get those teeth like that this is a guy figuring it out. i'm not wasting more energy fighting with them my route to the white house is for the american people and is driving them crazy he didn't spend the whole time talking about that this is what we are going to do this is how bad it is and i'm excited for you to want me to do and people are getting behind it and it drives them crazy. >> it's 1 thing to say they won't go to those cities and can they hold something in their district as its empty as they are out drying them there.

>> he turned half of america into the bronx like bottom line is all of a sudden they identify with the bronx doing this with red states and to your point you talk about how they deal and feelings they personally attack those not against them and when they say deplorable and say morons are clones we know who they are talking about. when trump says a policy is stupid is not talking but individual he's talking about the law that's the difference they haven't figured that out they personally attack the american voter. >> the only thing joe biden has a bag are his feces. >> greg: thank you. you know who wrote that joke ainsley earhardt.

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>> a story in 5 words. >> greg: 5 words hopeless biden wants to me. the biden harris campaign is looking to hire a meme manager to join their digital team and bolster their internet strategy we have to go back to the original point in the a block. if you aren't trafficking real things may be it's based on

obvious troops i will show you my favorite memes you have it here withdrew we go. as all of that is real. all of israel and the problem is for biden he has his own meme. what he is think is this hopeless for the campaign? >> the qualifications you have to live in delaware like working in dark spaces and working below ground having to be vaccinated. the guy just crapped his pants.

or the co*ke that could end up in your face. listen my meme is also real as they loaded it up and got ready to go. that's kreis -- classic. if you try to pull this on trump 's words would just laugh because they would say the same thing if you are trying to make fun of trump about anything it's over ready known. >> when i started conversation the only way have a real conversation with somebody about a political party whatever it is can you tell me 3 bad things about the candidate you are voting for and to trim people do it all the time he never shuts up and ask biden person they struggled to tell you 3 bad things we can't have a

conversation they can't even admit his brain is did you think of joe even knows what i mean miss. >> you thank you need to head to delaware to make 1. how is this job not remote? >> i'm honestly asking can anybody think of a reason. is there a reason to do it this way? i don't know. and i meme as they put it on that 1. i like their show on the cw back in the day single mom who works too hard and never stops. i know that's ridiculous to ask

as biden got his arm around joan and the then you should definitely move to delaware as a possible for the left a meme. >> why did we not get movie quality memes. we got photos this guy is a guest niigata colon want to trade? boxers or briefs, it depends like it. as you just don't get it your basis find your little group progressive memes you're

overloading you don't care you're voting for you. making more memes for them instead of pulling out talking to the real america people he don't as for kat was struggling what is a meme. and some but he lied to us and told us they were just pictures. but we will deal with that later >> greg: tyrus makes a point there is other priorities in this. >> you would think it goes to the fact they have to hide him which is a millennial's vote for big joe he's like you he was in the basem*nt as well the punches a couple directions first of all this is why right there he

looses the young vote because he's jerking around with memes and pajama boys put stuff out in the dead of night do you think people in their care about biden's meme factory someplace located in delaware they could care less. secondly think about what he does all day you look at the white house schedule and you can look at online there's like 1 thing. president gets on a plane go somewhere comes home. what is he do all day if you had an honest schedule what would it say. president gets up and heads to the kitchen president rummages through the refrigerator as he returns to his easy chair and you look at past presidents for donald trump he's under indictment he's going up doing rallies i like this because it really captures right now why he's behind. he is losing young people but not talking to people tell us

about the border or the economy. >> greg: the reason memes work further right or conservatives are trump because economy is tangible crime is tangible, transact of his. if you see a guy and address you know it's a guy an address of the left can't meme with that because of they are too busy telling you it's not a guy and address which makes the meme funny. up next we can't help but laugh when a leftist group fires its stafect f arexvy is a vaccine used to prevent lower respiratory disease from rsv in people 60 years and older. arexvy does not protect everyone and is not for those with severe allergic reactions to its ingredients. those with weakened immune systems may have a lower response to the vaccine. the most common side effects are injection site pain, fatigue, muscle pain, headache, and joint pain. i chose arexvy. rsv? make it arexvy.

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>> mostly you. >> i beg to differ went after everybody and all the people in all the people that were in charge of that got laid off yesterday i don't like dancing on people's employment graves i will make this exception is these are people remember they were trying to get fox off the air try to get twitter shut down now they are gone what say you. >> when the people he got fired spending a lot of time on her twitter going back she really hates you official stockers. >> for the media watchdog thing is a video where she makes several videos on the show making fun of it saying you don't have big celebrities on just random conservatives as if

your immediate watchdog you can google and cm a libertarian you think a month you are a fact checker and my walking around like i'm a big celebrity obviously we have 3 raiders. we admit that so it seems like for the attitude of im speaking truth to power and fact checking he just not googling yourself. >> greg: they are lazy and unemployed. >> we don't bring in big celebrities what are we talking about. i don't mean to to my own hat but i'm going to tip it. they've done their best work they said i date my children for fun -- beat my children for fun bully gutfeld nonsense maybe all the time and energy they took complaining about it there

bringing honest liberty guest means you're an idiot to help build the show as those of the roots of peter not even know it's on the show that's what makes me laugh about them as what we need to do is call up 3 of them and say 1 of the was going to get a job. you can use their skills towards other people all you have to do is bury each other. 1 eu gets the job though make 1 decision i know the guy who does you. we need to offer 1 of them were for the team help fix her problem's when they run out of top ramen and they go it's either get a job at got felder move back home marty living at home. >> you know what mom is going to say i'm not losing another step

husband because a you take the job from gutfeld. >> the reason there laying off everybody has nothing to do with elon musk suing them is because they are irrelevant with the new media whether it's washington post new york times or cnn and msnbc they are doing this already they're already trying to get everybody fired or counseled so media manner -- media matters was no longer needed. >> so i do anything like that inbox for the meme job is getting flooded right now with pajama boy in his basem*nt flows means can do the job and has an impeccable pedigree at media matters you know what it really means media matters when it's in evidence they think it's musk there cutting their losses they did a review they licked that the people who made them the most vulnerable and they are

saying we have to excise these people because it will look terrible we're going to have to say we fire the people who did that i do know that right now look online when i saw this topic flooded with these people all saying i'm available they won't want that job. >> nobody would hire some but who all they do is spend their time on google trying to cancel people why would you want somebody like that on your staff you have any sympathy for these poor souls. >> if you do your job well stop worrying about what other people are doing at their job is wind of keeping their job. worry about, getting cancel rather just do your job well and people gravitate to you or they don't but their job was to try to get people fired.

>> you see it across the industries look at disney, disney is getting killed sure enough there is a lawsuit filed their cnn had their lowest number 33 years at any and realize they were around that long is happening across the industries everybody feels there is an adjustment as were eventually going to adjust to where we were you had your party for 4 years the parties over. >> greg: this party is never overwhelmed may be in 15 minutes and then i pity you coming upp never stale when we open your . and something serious may be behind those itchy eyes. up to 50% of people with graves'

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her look 1 leg didn't stop her from explaining everything to me at least. kat when you look back is there somebody you would like to complement? >> as the way you want to be loved is the way you love others i love complements and everybody in my life that i love already knows how i feel like comment on

other people incessantly i think i've got it covered. i don't know what that meant. i'm sorry i would like to thank you greg for helping us get where we needed to go. thank you sir thank you so much. >> that was the entire point of the block. >> greg: 8 years for that let them soak it in. when you look back at your life. >> everybody. i think back to people obviously we have a father no longer with us and going outside the family context as a teacher almost all of us realize how much influence teachers have and that makes it so upsetting that we've given it all to the knuckled heads who have it now. if i look back and think about the people what they put that on i come down to a couple of

teachers who probably don't even remember me but they had a big impact. >> so many teachers touched me. >> i was going to say. there's people i would like to complement again but they have me blocked. i will follow your lead is growing up in the catholic church and flip the script and thank the priest who didn't have an effect on me in that way. on 1 hand i avoided a lot of trauma on the other hand a group insecure wondering if i wasn't good looking as a kid. >> kat got blocked for caring too much i'm thinking of you. blocked. >> of lived a passionate life.

>> thinking for me i am going with the professor told me not to double major in told me to go get a job. that was great. then he dumped me. i'm kidding. up next to game show clip with a freudian slip.

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>> ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> greg: it's friday before a holiday weekend so nobody's watching check out this clip. >> ♪ ♪ right in the butt. >> what?

>> a lake. >> this is the best that set. >> greg: the irony of this vince is the puzzle was of this is the best, this was the best. >> even better is he says right in the bot and then at the category that this is the best. and if you don't have the tv you're looking at the tv it's like wait a minute and my watching p*rn how did that get on again rate. it can't even be rate in the butt because it with with the been 2 of the t as he could adjust been some other guy got the answer rate in the wheel of fortune but because he did this he is that a legend. >> greg: how much money would he have even 1.

this is so you really win in life. >> the money he was going to win would lead him to that later in the evening. he jumped at the gun counted the proverbial chicken before it hatched. so it wasn't even close rate is 5 letters i see how your brain would go there. >> your brain was already there as thinking if i win the money tonight there's no way my wife can say no that's what he was thinking. that's exactly it. >> if you go face the but that works. >> you don't watch those movies okay. >> his reaction after he says it and he says no is like what do you mean now. >> he had to do something is life is in the audience there

these men to be like what i thought everybody knew that i'm not perverted i'm just you know the deal. >> greg: you think there is an idea for a show where he's on it >> we should have mawn next week. >> greg: filthy puzzles a wheel of misfortune. a wheel of perversion. >> every night at 3:00 am on foxnews. we will have plenty of memes for you as well. with instructions. >> greg: how is pat sajak? >> he just groaned. >> greg: is he checked out at this point? this is his last year. >> you would think he would live for these moments it breaks up the routine but closest. >> he's not the first man to get on wheel of fortune and get

money and potentially extra sex from his wife. >> the best thing about wheel of fortune is when people miss the way they miss it gets a window into their lives. it's like wow that guy is an interesting home life. as 1 brave white person clapped there we go it was funny i didn't say the word the rest of you shame on you. >> greg: we have to move on we will be right back.

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organic soil from miracle-gro has grown me the best garden i have ever had. good soil, and you get good results. look at that! the broccoli was fantastic. that broccoli! i think some of them were six, seven pounds. we are out of time! thank you to all and our studio audience, "fox news @ night" with jamie trace gallagher is next. i'm greg gutfeld, i love you america. -- dreamy -- >> trace: evening everybody, i'm kevin corke, 8:00 pm out, 11

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Greg Gutfeld examines the news of the day through a satiric lens fused with pop culture.

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